GOBLIN KINGDOM FACED WITH ILLEGAL DWARF INVASION!
by Eilzel
Summary: A parody newspaper article, in Guardian fashion, putting an alternative slant on the Dwarfs battle with the Goblins in Moria... Review returned ;-)


**GOBLIN KINGDOM FACED BY ILLEGAL DWARF INVASION!**

**HUNDREDS OF GOBLINS MURDERED IN NIGHT OF BLOODSHED!**

**GOBLIN KING MURDERED BY ELDERLY HUMAN LEADER!**

The goblin population of Moria have been left reeling this morning following an unexpected journey into their isolated realm by a coalition of dwarves and men.

It has been reported that a force of just thirteen dwarves entered Moria just after sunset last night. There, the Great Goblin, who has ruled the subterranean city since the start of the Second Age, ordered the trespassers to be apprehended at once. In a struggle which followed in the Great Hall hundreds of goblins were savagely butchered, it is not yet known if all those killed were soldiers. The dwarves were aided by an elderly human who is believed to be a wizard named Gandalf 'the Grey'. Before fleeing the wizard, armed with a sword, cut down the Goblin King. The body of the long time leader was found sliced across the belly and face.

The historic friction that exists between dwarf and goblin tribes had seen a relative peace in recent decades. Now violence between the two has erupted once again between the two peoples. This attack comes as something of surprise as dwarfs had recently been discovered to have been planning on a venture to retake their old lands in Erebor, locally referred to as 'The Lonely Mountain'. Moria, itself also a former Dwarf city, has been inhabited by goblins since the start of the Third Age yet relations between Moria and the outside world have remained indifferent in recent years. This pacifying of the goblin race has been credited to the kingship of the Great Goblin who, being aware of his subjects past failures and the suitability of Moria for goblin habitation, had acknowledged little need for expansionist invasions in the outside world.

Now sadly what appears to be a group of vigilante dwarves have reopened the possibility of resuming conflicts between the peoples of Middle-Earth. Information from an inside source suggests however than the dwarves have no interest in Moria itself. The goblin city simply offered the quickest route in their quest to retake Erebor.

Perhaps the decision to do so and callous slaughtering of so many goblins can be attributed to our own society's prejudice where goblins are concerned. For a long time now the idea of goblins as a smelly, wretched, barbaric, darkness dwelling, carnal race has been part of our discourse. The dwarfs have consistently pressed this view following the end of the wars between the two peoples meaning that our world has never come to accept goblins as part of our society. Thus they are confined to unpalatable alcoves where they grow accustomed to darkness and from birth till death, recoiling at the mere sight of daylight. The food they eat is not fit for a dog yet we cry in horror when some trespasser in their domains is heard to have been eaten by them. Perhaps we ought to consider our own share of the blame; today, the mere sight of a goblin outside the caves in justification enough for immediate execution. Indeed the dwarf invasion is surely a result of an intolerant society that refuses to accept those who are different. That a wizard would find supporting such acts appropriate simply displays how these attitudes are rampant even among the elites in our society.

It is as yet unknown who will now step in as leader of the Moria goblins now the peace keeping Great Goblin is no more. There are already suggestions of leadership being assumed by the great White Orc, Azog, who fled defeated from the last great battle between dwarves and goblins at the start of the age. If true this would dramatically alter the political nature and relations in Middle-Earth for good. The White Orc is a zealous extremist and will not maintain a continuity that will confine goblins to the caves.

Whether the goblins respond in a hostile militaristic manner, and who could expect anything less, or not remains to be seen. Whatever the outcome it is clear the varying peoples of Middle-Earth need to establish an interracial diplomacy that goes beyond historic stereotypes. The passivity of the goblins has been disrupted and peace once again threatened. It is the dwarves who must answer for this avoidable act of aggression. It is for our society to answer why this act of aggression could happen to begin with.


End file.
